Adopting our Child

Hey everyone. Ok, so Mark and I are learning that we for sure are not the best bloggers in the world. At least you can know that if I post, something must really be on my heart…. which it is now.

Here’s a short update…

We LOVE it here in Charleston. God has opened friendships so quickly, our marriage is better than ever (and I didn’t even think that was possible), we love where we’re living, and we love our jobs! The Lord has absolutely blown me away with these past 2 months. Some things have worked out differently than we planned, but wow, am I glad…. which bring me to the reason for this post.

As most of you know we’ve been trying 3 years this October  to have a baby. I found out last year that I have Stage 4 endometriosis and had surgery to remove it. They put me on a shot (Lupron)  for 6 months to get rid of more of it. I’ve heard horror stories about endo. and Lupron, but we’ve had zero problems with both. The Dr’s said they can never say for sure that I can’t get pregnant, but that the endo. is too aggressive to think it’ll happen without medicine or fertility treatments. We prayed about it, and neither of us had a peace about any fertility treatments, pills, etc. We’ve simply prayed and waited….. and enjoyed being just us while we have the time!

Before we ever tried to get pregnant 3 years ago, we actually discussed adopting before we tried to have a biological child, but decided that we’d pursue adoption one day down the road.

After both being sure about no using fertility treatments, we started praying through adoption. We’ve been told not to “give up” on getting pregnant. Let me assure you we are not “giving up” on anything, except on having things the way we planned. If the Lord wants us to get pregnant, we will get pregnant and it will be wonderful!!If the Lord wants us to adopt, we will adopt and it will be wonderful!! I’ve never been in a more freeing situation, when, had you asked me a few years ago, I’d say it would be a heart breaking situation.

We’re now walking down the road to adoption. We’re researching agencies, private, legal, financial, and wow, has it been a slight roller coaster. There is SO much involved and can be very confusing… and expensive. We’ve learned a lot of things and have had a lot of people that have made it much more clear for us. We’ve possibly even found ways that it’s less expensive, which has been really cool. We joke that Church planting and adoption don’t go hand in hand in our minds…. support raising…. and cost of adoption.Yikes! Great thing is, as I seem to be slowly learning, God isn’t too concerned about what goes hand in hand in my mind!

 I mainly tell you this to ask for your prayer. Earlier I was reading forums where women and girls are pregnant and they’re deciding whether to have an abortion or give their baby up for adoption. It was through a private site so I couldn’t comment. Let’s just say it was quite humbling to hear about where these ladies are in life. I can’t imagine it. We have to eventually write a letter to birthmothers who might be reading our profile. I mean…. could there be a harder task?! How do I share with a woman who is considering giving her child to us how I feel… about her going through what she must be going through…. about how much I want to love and raise her child as my own… about how we have  God who somehow works all of this to His glory, and for the good of us all, even though I completly don’t understnad it all?  I told Mark that it feels like when I hear of a person who needs a heart transplant. God blesses them with a new heart and it’s an amazing miracle and answer to prayer, and then there’s the realization that someone had to die for them to receive that new heart. It’s got be humbling to receive that heart. That’s how I feel with this. If a woman chooses us take her child, we are blessed with the miracle we’ve been praying for so long. Yet, there’s the realization that she had to make an incredible sacrifice for our child.

Goodness, I just feel like it’s the perfect picture of who God is. It’s so much bigger than we can ever wrap our minds around. Some would say it’s not fair that I can’t get pregnant, some would say it’s not fair what she’s going through. I say that it’s nothing but humbling…. to know that the Lord loves that baby enough to work His plan for that child and everyone involved, whether some deem it fair or not.

All of that long windedness (yes, it’s a word. ) to say please pray for us as we enter in this process, as we write that letter. I want to somehow be able to say in a letter exactly what’s in my heart for her, for the baby, and for the whole process….. feels a little bigger than me right now. Please pray for that mom who may be pregnant with our child now or who may get pregnant with him/her in the near future. Pray that if she doesn’t already know Christ, that she might meet Him through this process and have the peace and love only He can give. Please pray for Mark and I, that we are on the same page throughout the process and know the right timing to proceed to each next step. Pray that we take it all in stride, good and bad, and remember God is in control of it all. And, of course, please join us in praying for that baby we will one get to call our own. I love the fact that I will get to share with him/her that there were so many praying for them before we ever had them.

Well, that’s enough for now. I’ll update as we find out anything new!!

~L